Monday, May 30, 2016

Spring What?

Hmm...I'm going to have some fun writing this. The bad kind of 'fun', that is. Not for any real reason but the reply given by a certain someone in a community chat group left me wondering whether to laugh or give him a blast of my tongue. Oops, make it fingers. I mean, no one goes tapping the keyboard of their mobile with their tongue do they? That will be yucky and plain stupid of the person. Then again. Oh my, before the keyboard warriors of the goons report me to the nearest Police Station, let me just say this: Nah, your bosses ain't worth my spit. This has nothing to do with them so why don't just go back to your mama.

Now, where was I? Oh, OK.

My command of the English Language is bad. At times, it really sucks, I readily admit. But when you find someone who is supposed to be a Someone and he making a mistake, it somehow made me feel like a Nobel Laurette nominee. Now, should I laugh or should I bring out my 12 gauge? But since I am not in possession of the latter, I guess laugh will have to do even if by myself. Now, that reminds me.

Within the month I've not been able to move around, I've been catching up on some TV series, especially those episodes which either I missed or they just did not reach our shores. I mentioned it in an earlier posting how I watched the entire 2 seasons of Stargate Universe. I thought 'Wow! That was something'. Try watching the entire 5 seasons of 'Fringe'. Me, I nearly went bananas. 5 seasons within 3 weeks? I did go bananas (grin).

Don't get me wrong. I love the series and I really do admire John Noble for the character/s he played. To make it short, in the series he was a mad scientist who was released from a mental asylum to help the FBI solve some paranormal and what-have-you events, and one who voluntarily had himself lobotomised for fear that he might venture onto some scientific experiments which would wreak havoc on Earth. The eccentricity he portrayed was short of a joy to watch. Now, being eccentric is normally associated with being either rich or one with high intelligence. If you do not have one of the two, people will just say you're a loony. Quite like the guy writing this, I suppose.

Then, there was 'The Night Manager'. That, was a gem of a watch even if was a mini-series of 6 episodes. Adapted from a novel by the same name and written by Le Carre, There was a tinge of disappointment though. Won't say much but if one remember a 1987 US TV series with the title 'Wise Guy', then one gets the drift. Still, it's a notable watch. Oh, for fans of 'House's Hugh Laurie, do catch him in an entirely different setting. Even if you're not, you should because you may just love the ending. Now, no peeking, please.

I have it out of my chest already. Really, I don't have to go bad-tapping that someone now. Still feeling naughty, I'll just let you into it. Just a tad, mind you.

Someone: "Local Authorities will be doing Spring Cleaning in our corner of the city.
People: "Yeah! Yeah! Clap! Clap!"

Mighty nice of them, I thought. But since many Resident Groups have recently had their annual 'Gotong-royong', just what is this Spring Cleaning about then? So, being the illiterate I am I asked: "Can you clarify on that?"

After a deafening silence of about 8 minutes, I got my reply and was really anticipating something really really meaningful. After all, as one of the representatives from the residential area I am in, I would need to report something to them and not ride a horse all around howling 'The British are coming! The British are coming!', forgetting that they left some 70years ago. Now, that would really be dumb, not eccentric. But anyway, he replied in all capital letters:

I need my 12 gauge!

Thursday, May 12, 2016

Perils of A 5 Series

The man knocked on the door of the primary screening room and opened it without waiting for a reply. He then hobbled in and the nurse asked "what happened to your leg?". 
"Think I broke my heart" the man replied nonchalantly, and the the nurse laughed out loud.
"Your poor thing" said the nurse as she begin checking his blood pressure and temperature.
"So what's with the bandage, then?", she played along.
"Well, no one taught me how to bandage my heart". The nurse, feeling jovial, began humming 'Patah Hati', and old Malay song.

I have a new Battle Cry. But before I unveil it, I do have a confession to make. Moving around with a limp since I cannot remember when,, I was not able to run as well as most boys would and constantly find myself warming the reserve bench whenever the class has a soccer match. Worse still, my two elder brothers would often trick me into supporting the losing team of the English soccer matches. The English Premier League was non-existent then and those matches played between the First Division teams were normally shown several months late which my two brothers having known the results, forced me to support the losing team. After a while, I gave up on soccer only to pick it up again at the age of 13 but then, only as a spectator.

With the Merdeka Stadium just next to my school and the home ground for Selangor soccer matches, I did not need much prodding by classmates to go cheering. It was there and then I learnt of the game's technicalities and techniques and whatever else there is to know.Or so I thought-lah.

Over the years as the team's fortune takes a dip, My friends and I consigned ourselves to watching the important matches only. Needless to say, we are not part of the diehard fans, but fans we were. Under coach Mehmet Durakovic, the team won the prized Malaysia Cup last year. We were delighted and looked forward towards another grand year of soccer supremacy. However, that anticipation is being muddied currently.

Losing to Singapore is acceptable. History has shown both team sharing an almost even statistics on being victors. Losing to the Singapore Invitation Team as we did recently is acceptable too for the same reasons mentioned. But losing to SIT on home ground advantage is hard to swallow. Worse still, losing to SIT on home ground advantage when they were one man down is not acceptable and humiliating. Thus as a fan, I now cry "Sack Zainal Abidin!'. Sack him and bring back Mehmet Durakovic or get someone better! Erm...this is an alternative to political sacking most Malaysians, yours truly included, yearn for but a taboo subject to be writing about ya.

Now, since I mentioned footie, perhaps I should tell that my left ankle ballooned in size again. This is the 4th time in 8 years or so since the BERSIH march to Istana Negara but luckily this time the swell is not so big as previous 3. A friend took me to a Chinese Medical Practitioner who happens to be a Qi Gong Master, while another kindhearted friend paid for my consultation at a Chiropractor who incorporate Oriental and Western philosophy into his practice. Between the 2, I am more comfortable with the Master Soon (image below) though he admits not being able to do much for me. Perhaps though, he might be able to assist anyone reading this entry. He is in SS2, PJ, but you would need to call for an appointment. My apologies as the image is not very clear.

As for the Chiropractor, I do not have his business card on hand but he is located in Empire-Soho, Subang Jaya. I did not get to see the leading doctor himself that day, but the lady doctor who attended my case, suffice to say, she had my other sensations tingling. Oops!

For the past 3 weeks or so, I have been lying on the sofa doing whatever comes to mind. Could not walk nor sit for a long period as I also have Plantar Fasciitis which have been plaguing me for more than 8years now. It is only of recent that I'm seeking treatment for PF at Sg Buloh Hospital but the physio leaves much to be desired. Perhaps, my expectation is too high. But hey, for a man who's been in 5series for several years now, I think I should. Talking of which.

Lazing on the sofa somehow had me thinking of the 6series. I wonder what it will be like moving around in it. Given the current situation, I might be better stead than now. Hopefully.  But maintenance-wise, goes without saying, would be higher. With more than 6years to go on current state, I guess I'll just have to wait it out. Now, before someone has the silly notion I'm talking about the Beemers, heck no! But yes, it is something which can get one sentimental about. Please do blame this song which has been playing in my years for about a week now.

The man limped to the Pharmacist counter soon as his name was called. The lady there started handing out the medications and instructions and the man looked at the lady."No grass?"
She laughed. Definitely a different portrayal of her very serious look before.
"Not even Crack?" the man asked again.
Again she laughed and gently shooed him away.
"How cruel," he said with a smile and started his limp back to his car.