Intelligent in Communication

The above is a picture quite similar to a seminar folder which an agency I worked for designed for a corporate client in the IT business. Alhamdulillah, then, I had just joined the advertising industry and was given the job to come out with a concept, fitting for such a big client. I was never shown the client's brief and had to take the word of the agency's Managing Director, and that was what I did.
That, was sometime in 1997 when the Internet was relatively new in Malaysia and even I was not connected yet. But like everyone else then, I too was excited about it and was looking forward to when the whole of Malaysia would be connected.

Shifting through piles of books from many stock photography agencies looking for 'when I see it, I'll know what it is', I found a picture similar to the above and almost immediately a tag line came to my mind - Intelligent in Communication. My rationale was simple and as below:
'Human and Dolphins posses the highest intelligence quotient amongst all living beings on Earth. Though of different specie, the picture shows how the 2 tries to communicate, with each trying to find a common platform.
Similarly with the IT company and the participants(potential clients) they had invited for the seminar - each are intelligent in their respective fields, and are looking for a common platform for communication purposes."

"Damn good idea!" said my boss. "You have a very bright future in this industry!" Off course, the above sentence was just my wish as he said nothing of such sort to me, while making tons of money charging the client who was extremely happy to see the mock-up of their folder.

6 years later, I found myself in an organisation which was totally new to me. No names need to be mentioned, but being in the org meant I had to liaise very closely with many government departments, organisations, and their officers - from the clerical level right up to the top honcho, as well as meeting the public in events throughout Malaysia. It was quite fun then, but also very tiring. The fun part was meeting the public, and handling press conferences involving some top officials. Now, the fun part about the latter is not in the PC itself, rather meeting and getting some information not found in the media. Some, I put them aside as mere gossips, no matter how juicy they were. While others, were quite shocking like the one below.

It seem, when the government offices began moving into their respective buildings in Putrajaya, many had to make do without any IT hardwares for quite a duration. This, caused quite a setback for our good officers to accomplish their tasks and day-to-day operation. But over time, things soon improved for the better and we can now quite lay claim to have the cutting edge in the world of IT, at least for this region. Or so I thought.

Last Tuesday, Star InTech had a story of how a MAS Employee without any IT background, had saved the airline a whopping RM70 million, simply because the airline does not have an online system for the maintenance of its aircrafts! Hello!
Foremost, one would think for any company in the travel industry would need a reliable top-of-the-mark system which encompass their entire operation, and most especially the maintenance division. Now, one would also think that not only is the division vital for the company in ensuring the safety of passengers and staff, but the fleet itself - for an airline without a plane or a good safety record, might as well cease to exist.

Futher, I may not be entirely correct here, but isn't MAS the maintenance contractor for several other airlines in this region as well? How, could this matter of (quite fair to say 'absolute') importance, be overlooked by the top people in the division? How could the IT and top goons in the airline not even have given thought to it when considering my earlier statement - without a plane or....- they would not have jobs to hold on to? Intelligent in Communication? I think they, are not.

To Shahrul Isahak, kudos to you and your friends for having produced a system and saved your employer a huge sum of money. They - MAS - should give you and your buddies at least 10% of the money saved as a show of gratitude. The government should also laud people similar to them with incentives and protect them as an interest to the nation. I, for one, would certainly hate to see them being turned into a modern day Hang Nadim, as recent events in Malaysia might imply.

And oh! I can also imagine should a PR MP bring this matter up to Parliament; one or the entire Sarkas MPs would reply "Don't believe in the newspaper! Like bloggers, they too like to make up stories!".

A Desert Rose

Recently, quite soon after bro kerpie had virus infection on his laptop, I too suffered an attack which prompted me to call my nephew to reformat and upload a new OS. He did just that in a matter of a couple of hours and soon, I was back online. However, I had to download quite a number of softwares which were erased. Doing so, reminded me of the first time I went online sometime in 2001, and was later introduced to the world of chatting via icq and YM. Though now I have abandoned icq and hardly use YM, I still remember experiencing culture-shock during the initial months of chatting.

Chatters, I learned then, like to use abbreviations of sentences which I too soon learn to use as well, where short sentences were abbreviated to brb, rofl, ic, and quite a number more. Much later on, I then developed my own to be used as a reply; whenever someone use 'oic', I would reply PLO, then later Hamas. This, had them stumped. Off course, PLO and Hamas had nothing to do with chat abbreviations, but I sort of use it as a payback tool for being baffled by people using abbreviations; in the initial stage of chatting, I had the impression that there were many rude people. This came about everytime I crack a joke and the other party would reply with 'lol'. Not knowing what it meant then, I thought they were calling me 'bahlol' in shortform. Surely - in Malay usage of the word - that is rather insulting. But as time pass by, I found out not only the meaning of 'lol', but the true meaning of 'Bahlol'.

The true Bahlol, is actually a pious man living in the times of Khalifah Harun Rashid. As the stories I have read about him points out, Bahlol was quite a wealthy but honest man. His honesty was such that, it sometimes put him in dangerous position. Yet, he continued on with his way, much to the chagrin of several people. Below, is one of the many stories of Bahlool I picked up from here.

Bohlool Sits on Haroun Rashid's Throne

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One day Bohlool arrived at Haroun's palace and saw that the throne was empty. There was no one to stop him, so he unhesitatingly and fearlessly went and sat in Haroun's place. When the court slaves saw this, they immediately started whipping him and took him off the throne. Bohlool started crying. Haroun came and saw this; he asked those nearby why Bohlool was crying. A slave told him the whole story. Haroun scolded them and tried to cheer Bohlool up.

Bohlool said he wasn't crying at his condition, but at Haroun's condition. "I sat on the seat of Khalifate wrongfully for a few seconds and received such a beating and endured such misfortune; but you have been sitting on this throne all your life! What troubles you must receive, yet you still don't fear the consequence."

end/-


Reading the short story, I can't help but equating the last para to the fools running this country. Perhaps, we need more people like Bahlool to remind them of their sacred duties. Unfortunately, we only have too many bahluls - of the corrupted Malay usage - sitting together with those fools. InsyAllah, begining with the Permatang Pauh by-election, we will be able to cleanse our land of them.

Do listen to the video below.

The main problem we have for now, is the entity using the scales of justice as the Dajjal would in later times; they also go by another name which is now widely known as the accursed Sarkas.

Under The Hood - A Soviet Joke Made Local?

Jokes can be very funny at time, especially if its ethnic jokes made by the people of the same ethnicity. There have been English, Irish, Welsh, Polish, Russian, Indian and even Malay jokes, cracked from time to time, with some leaving you in guffaws - by yourself - and having onlookers thinking you are already off your rockers. I personally have experienced such an incident, which is why now, I prefer not to have reading materials whilst in public places. I certainly would hate - while enjoying a good laugh - to find myself helplessly being carted away to a mental institution. That, would be quite like a scene from an old British sitcom, 'Only When I laugh' - the best jokes it seems, would be to have the laugh on oneself.

Sending my car for some works just now, reminded me of an old Russian joke.

During the time of the Russian Empire of USSR, the citizens wanting to purchase an electronic or electrical item would check on the date the item was made. This was done to avoid to avoid any defective items which the store would sell, regardless the defects, and the non-existent After Sales Service of the manufacturer. The dates the citizens look for are as below along with their rationale:
Early of the Month: The worst manufacturing period. Workers put on a shoddy job just meet their quota of the month.
Middle of the Month: Products are better as workers near completion of their quota.
End of Month: Best manufacturing date! Products are made after completion of quota. Hence, workers put quality finish to their job.

As mentioned, I sent my car to a workshop. Since the car's warranty period has expired, I chose a workshop nearby as from a previous lube-change experience, I found their service to be satisfactory. The work needed for my car was a relatively easy shock-absorber change. Noting I am using a 1.5liter car, the foreman brought out 2 boxes of new shock-absorbers while his charges worked on getting the old pair out. Things looked easy enough when they were dismantling, but soon they faced the problem of getting the absorber into the spring. After about 15 minutes of futile trying, they reported the matter to their superior. And when the superior came to take a look, he soon shook his head - my 1.5liter car came factory fitted with a pair of 1.6liter shock absorbers! Apart from the width of the rod being different, they cost a bit more too - an extra RM60 each!

Now, I don't know if this is standard for Proton cars to be fitted components not meant for the makes, but it does make me feel like being shoved with the soviet joke above. Honestly, why would a 1.5liter car use a 1.6liter component? Anyone?

Jokes aside, Alina gave a link to a beautiful song which I have embedded below. I think the title is Einsamer Hirte, but am unable to confirm it, nor the origin. Looking at the name and the spelling of the song, I think it is from the Balkans; would appreciate anyone giving more info on the song. The song does, sound pretty much like Biddhu's 'Aria', which I am unable to find on the net. And, thanks Alina.

Engaged!

"I'm sorry, sir" said the girl on the end of the telephone line, "but the manager is engaged".
"Engaged?"I retort. "I thought she's already married!"
"Er..yes sir. She's married".
"But you just said she's engaged! This is serious and I think I should report that your manager is married and at the same time engaged. My guess, they are both different people, the husband and the fiance, I mean".
"Yes...er, I mean no!"
"Yes, she's married and engaged? And no, she married and engaged to the same guy?"
By that time, the girl was getting exasperated and I was losing my patience, waiting to whack just about anyone on the line.

While the above is actually just a scenario I imagine in my mind, getting close to losing patience is not. Currently as I write, I am on the phone line trying to speak to the helpline of the main Internet Service Provider in Malaysia. In fact, the girl I have in mind for the scenario above, should be the girl whose voice is being used for the automatic voice reply, repeating perhaps for the umpteenth time "Please hold, your call is important to us. All our agents are engaged at the moment bla bla bla". Then, the line goes dead.

Off course, unless the girl is as sweet as a doctor can be, then I might just go weak on my knees. But that, will only happen if we are face to face with each other and not on the line which makes me want to shout profanities to a machine! I have done that to their GM sometime back, but hmm...maybe I should do it to the machine as well. But what good would it do me. It would be a totally different story though, were I in possession of some pictures of the Sarkas people. Then, I would gladly do so with all my heart. Still, it would come to nothing.

In an argument with the Service Provider management sometime back, I threw up my arms in despair when they vehemently defended their unofficial motto "Copper-based lines are best suited for our technology". Well, that maybe true for their technology, but what about for the customers? Sheesh!

It gets so bad that I can't even access their speedometer site. Double sheesh!