Friday, February 08, 2008

A Different Kind of Love Song

When I first heard this song back in 1976, I was like many other people thinking it was just another love song about a boy and a girl. The song after all, did not indicate otherwise, except for a line in the lyrics which many either chose to ignore or did not understand. Then, somehow sometime later, I read what the true meaning of this was.

Released in 1972, this song was written and sung by David Gates in memory of his father who had died earlier. The excerpt here says it all: "My success would have been so special to him as he was my greatest influence. So I decided to write and record Everything I Own about him. If you listen to the words, 'You sheltered me from harm, kept me warm, gave my life to me, set me free,' it says it all."

Half the night earlier, I was on the line chatting with a very dear and close friend, and mentioned the loss Cikgu and akak just had. Whilst doing that, I could not help but wonder how or what I would do were I to be in the situation.

For the past 15 years or so my emak and I have been living an almost solitary life. I mean, we have been through an awful lot together and though there have been times where I have been out of line, she has always been there for me as she would with any of her children.

Funny, its only now I realised that last I wrote about emak was more than a year ago. And as much as I would like to so now, I find myself unable to do for so many reasons. The fears which I relayed earlier in the evening was soothed and calmed by the dear friend who said "lets cross the bridge when we get to it"; a most apt and wise thing to say and do, thank you. But lets not get into that now.

If ever there is a song I would like to dedicate to my emak, I guess the song above is it.

"Wahai Pemeliharaku, kasihanilah mereka(ibubapa) sebagaimana mereka memelihara aku semasa aku kecil." (17:24)


Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Shah Rir!

nice song, altho the first time you heard it was in the same year i was born!

this song "everything I own" has been a firm favourite for musicians who does covers. i remember back in mid 90s there was a local rock band called themselves The Lost Souls did a cover of this song and went on to win some local awards.

anyway, there's another similar dedication-to-dad song my Mike and the Mechanics, entitled The Living Years. i'm sure you guys tau punya.

tokasid said...

Salam Shah:

Yesterday, before our dear che'gu called, somehow my mind was like: Ting!! and mak came to my mind. I sms-ed by little sister and said mak is alright and she was outside talking to some neighbours who came and chat with her.
And I remember I haven't gone back to see her for about 10 weeks now.The last time I went back was before my Egyptian trip(which I owed fellow bloggars several episodes of reporting).

This CNY is actually a good time to go back but not for me. I have had enough of the PLUS crawl . I prefer the non- holiday weekends.Maybe next week or the week after that I'll go back.

Shah, mother is everything to us children...until one gets married.Some might not agree but thats the truth.Once you get yourself a wife you are stuck in between 2 women of your life.
If they have a healthy DIL-MIL relationship,Alhamdulillah for ALLAH had given you that nikmat tak terkata type.
If however they somehow become'll have a headache and some sleepless nights.
But some DIL-MIL can become like cats and dogs.Well they won't pull each others hair or something like that.But the duel is in silence mode and you know there's tension between them. Both have high stake: You!
Your mother will say to herself): His my lil' boy and only I know how take care of him.

And the wife will say to herself: He's a grown man and his my hubby!He has a different responsibilty now and thats ME!

When a situation like this arises, a man will be torn apart. He love his mother and Islam had taught him to do so. The fact that a hadith soheh had mentioned a son should serve and care for his mother 3 times before mentioning the father just showed how important mothers are in a man's life.

At the same time he loves his wife more.

It is important when someone wants to get married, he must make sure his soon-to-be wife understands the Islam's stand on mothers' status.
She must understand that ALLAH's redha towards a person is dependent to his mother's redha.
And ALLAH's redha towards a wife will depend on her husband's redha.

Conflicts of DIL-MIL are a 2 way affair and among them someone must be willing to bring down her own ego to stop this nonsense.
( Knew an acquintance who had 3 wives. Unfortunately his 2nd wife had shown complete disrespect towards his mother. She showed her displeasure when her MIL came visiting. So the hubby did the wisest thing he can think of (after periods of counselling his wife)- he divorced his 2nd wife. He told me: I only have one mother and ALLAH and Rasulullah saw had asked us to be respectful and caring to our mother.I must not hurt my mum's feeling esp at her age now.But my wife's action is hurting my mum silently and I know it without her telling me.
If my wife really loves me why can't she respect my mother. Doesn't she know while she is hurting my mum, she is actually hurting me and putting me nearer to the flames of Jahanam!So I have to let her go.I can have many wives,but I only got one mother!

I am really touched with what you had been doing to your emak.My hats off to you. I just cannot imagine what ALLAH will grant you with your mother's blessing. Subhanallah.

You take care of her well bro.And you take care of yourself too.

cakapaje said...

Salam kerp,

The only other version of this song I know was by Ken Boothe. But I will check out the Lost Souls.

I think I've heard of 'The Living Years' but am not sure. But thanks bro, will check that out too.

cakapaje said...

Wa'alaikumusalam Doc,

I do realise the problems between MIL-DIL and have seen plenty of it myself. Honestly, it does scare me. Perhaps, it is one of the reasons why I am still unattached.

InsyAllah, every night I do'a that the lady of my dream will be my pillar of strength and help me to be a pious son and a servant filled with taqwa and perhaps even zuhud. But thank you for reminding me about the hadith. I am, insyAllah, holding to it.

And thank you for your do'a, Doc. InsyAllah, I will.